Coming out from behind the lens.

It’s my birthday. I’m 42 today.

I’m so excited about the gift  I’m giving to myself… I’m making a BIG change on The Magic Onions in honor of 42 beautiful years on this magical earth.

I’m coming out from behind the lens.

I wrote my very first blog post on January 01, 2009.

I’ve had a lovely day looking back over those first posts… and seeing how sweet and little my children were then. Kitty was 5 and Teddy was only 2. They had dimples and curly hair and baby teeth.

Knitted Cowel : www.theMagicOnions.com

 

But one sadness at looking back through the years is that there are so few photos of me in there. I can count them on the fingers of my one hand.

I would tell you that the reason why there are so few photos of me is that I am always behind the camera. This blog is about our lives through my eyes and I have not needed to be in the photos.

Do you buy that? I didn’t think so.

If I allow myself to be vulnerable, open up a little and tell the truth, I will admit that I have shied away from being in photos because I have not liked the way I’ve look in them. How silly is that!

I’ve never lost the baby-weight I have been meaning to lose since having children. I have always thought I’d get around to it soon… months turned to years and here I am, 6 years later and still hiding out of the frame. That’s such a shame! I am so important to this family and yet I’m always missing from our photos.

I realize that one day, these pages will be treasures to Kitty and Teddy. They’ll be able to page back through their childhoods and remember all the little-everyday-things that made us so happy. How sad for them never to see me.

So, today, on my 42’nd birthday I’m changing… I’m coming out from behind the lens.

Here I am in all my birthday (and golden antler) splendor…

 

Knitted Cowel : www.theMagicOnions.comKnitted Cowel : www.theMagicOnions.comKnitted Cowel : www.theMagicOnions.comKnitted Cowel : www.theMagicOnions.com

 

Silly, silly me! All this wasted time. From now on, I’ll be on these pages too.

If you are like me and have hidden behind the scenes, I urge you to be brave and come out into the sunshine. We carry our families in our loving embraces and they will want to see us with them when they look back at these magical days.

We are beautiful just the way we are, all the more so for our imperfections.

Blessings and magic,

Donni

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51 Responses

  1. Yes!! I completely understand where you are coming from as someone who shies away from pictures of herself. BUT I also know that you are 100% right that you need and should be in these records and your children will treasure that. Having lost my mother recently (who incidentally also created a version of a Waldorf childhood for me), I know that I wish there were so many more photos of her around, and video, and just more. So, hooray for you! Thanks for all you do. Xx

    1. Thanks, Eowyn. That’s exactly what occured to me… how awful for them to look back and never see me.
      I’m sorry you lost your mom and I send you so much love.
      Thanks for the kind words.
      xo Donni

  2. Now aren’t you a sweetie Donni. Always knew you were.
    One feels and sees the love and joy in your life.
    Which you have shared with us all
    You GO girl
    Love Marie

  3. Hi Donni!

    While I haven’t been blogging much lately, I do know what you mean. I try to make sure there are pictures of me, too. It is far too easy to hide behind the camera and just act as the story teller.

    Happy birthday! Wishing you a wonderful new year.
    Hanneke

  4. First of all ~ Happy Birthday, Donni! :) I recently celebrated my 40th and had this same revelation. I love photos of my loved ones so not allowing mine to be taken is completely unfair to them. Here’s to being seen in 2015 and beyond! And you look stunning btw!

    1. Hi Priscilla… I know, right?! It’s just not fair to them… nor to us! 40’s is the beginning of wisdom for us it seems :)
      Here’s to being seen!
      xo Donni

  5. Well done, Donni. I wish I hadn’t waiting until I was 66 before doing the same thing! I was always too aware of my weight, double chins, and my hearing aids showing, LOL. I know, pathetic really! Not anymore. My grandchildren should know what I looked like, warts and all! My Mom passed away last year at the age of 99 and I have about 3 photos of her because she too hated having her pic taken. Note to self: I must not be like that! Keep up the creativity photos, but include yourself as well. Hugs from New Zealand.

    1. Yes, Tilly!!! Yay!! It’s never too late :) I love that … ‘warts and all’ ha ha… made me laugh :)
      Wow… 99. I bet she saw some changes in her lifetime. My Great Grandmother lived to be 103!
      Thanks for the kind words.
      xo Donni

  6. Happy birthday, friend! I had kind of noticed the same thing in my own photo archives this past year. Then recently I participated in a competition that required me to take selfies of myself engaging in outdoor activities. I was forced, for two months, to take these pictures, and they are some of the most fun and goofy pictures that I have, of US instead of just Cordelia, or just C and Don. I’m trying to keep up the habit, now that the competition is over. I can’t say that I’m doing it every day like I did those two months (let’s not go overboard now), but, you’re right! We are part of the experience and the memories. Why shouldn’t we be in the shot? Here’s to new beginnings. Yours looks great. :)

    1. What a great way to get passed the camera-shyness, Di!! And I know… it’s so good to be in there too, isn’t it :)
      xo

  7. Happy birthday, Donni! You are absolutely beautiful and I’m so glad to see the face behind the many inspirations I get from your blog,
    Your example is so inspiring, I have been hiding from camera (or crying over my “unattractive from” pictures) for way too long now, maybe it’s time to overcome this.

    Hope you had a great birthday.

  8. You are such a beautiful spirit which comes across in all you write and photograph. So glad you’ll be including yourself in the record of love going forward!

  9. Happy Birthday!!!! You ARE a beautiful lady!!!! I too hide from the camera, and have a hard time dropping baby weight. Thank you for the gentle nudge toward a braver/more contented spirit!

  10. Most inspiring thing I’ve read in a long, long time! And boy, oh boy are you shining beautifully! And how wonderful to have your kids witness your being in the spotlight too! I’m new to this blog and so happy to have stumbled on it. Thank you for your courageous expression! It’s rippling….what a gift! Happy Birthday! With gratitude…

    1. Oh Heather, you’ve brought a tear to my eye! Thank you! It’s amazing how we can shine when we put away fear :)
      Glad to have you here!
      xo Donni

  11. Congratulations for your birthday to your lovely family and business!!! Going through exactly the same thoughts finding only few precious pics with me and my children. Though the years dont hide at all I actually find that it makes us women more beautiful than ever. Dont hide especially in our superficial world of artificial beauty that will never be able to compete.

    1. Very true, Annette… age brings its own kind of beauty.
      No more hiding for me :)
      Thanks for your good wishes.
      xo Donni

  12. You shine like no other Donni. Hope you had a very Happy Birthday.
    After reading many of the comments above and realizing how well know you are, I feel so blessed to know you face to face. ;-)
    Blessings today and always.
    Alicia

    1. Thank you, dear Alicia, that’s such a kind thing to say. Yes, we are very blessed with our sweet Village :)
      xo always,
      Donni

  13. My friend, you are so beautiful. It’s only our loss that you have not been in the pictures but your loveliness shines through your words. I for one will be very happy to see more of your beautiful face! When are you coming to show it to me in real life? xxx

    1. Oh Hails… you make my eyes moisten … how sweet you are. We are planning on coming to NZ soon… not quite sure of when but it’s def on the plans. I think of you so often these days… I’m reading Outlander and the main character is Fraser McKensie :) She looks like you in my mind :)
      xoxoxoxo Donni

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