For many of us, having a peaceful, loving and connected home and family is at the top of our list for things we long for.
And at face value, it seems like peace, love and connection should be easy, right? We are good parents, our children are wonderful, we try so hard and yet our family life feels chaotic, fractured and disconnected.
Especially in these crazy and uncertain times we are trying to parent in, family life can feel particularly tumultuous. We seem to be all over the place with our emotions. We feel out of control. We feel exhausted. We feel anxious and we feel powerless to change anything.
And here’s where I can be of help. I”m here to share some quick and easy steps to help you cultivate peace, love and connection in your home.
As a Waldorf inspired parenting coach, when I sit down with a new mom to work through her challenges, the very first thing we discuss is her family’s daily rhythm? This is often a new concept and may feel a little limiting at first. But once we gain greater understanding of what a daily rhythm is (and what it is not), the benefits of this simple, yet nuanced, concept starts to make a lot of sense.
Let’s start by unpacking what a family rhythm is and all the wonderful things this simple concept can bring to your family.
What exactly is a family rhythm?
A family rhythm is the daily, weekly and yearly recurring activities that we do together, as a family, with intention.
Family rhythm can be broken down into two threads… daily rhythm and seasonal rhythm. Here, we’ll explore daily rhythm and how you can use this concept to help ground and connect your family. I’ll write about seasonal rhythm in another post.
So, what exactly is daily rhythm? A family rhythm is a carefully worked out plan of how your days will flow, a predictable roadmap of your daily activities with built-in cues to lead you and your children from one transition into the next.
Activities you choose to do as a family have a pattern which reflects the flow of your lives, the values you live by and the things you prioritize.
With a strong daily rhythm, everyone in the family knows what to expect throughout the day. And they know what is expected of them.
If you have a strong daily rhythm, simple daily activities, like self-care, mealtimes and sleep-times, become natural habits that flow easily throughout your day, instead of arguments that disrupt the harmony in your home.
When your daily rhythm is strong, transition resistance diminishes organically and your children will be able to move smoothly from one activity to the next.
I have a 2-minute video that shows you how it feels to your child to have a predictable daily rhythm. This video will clarify why rhythm is so important to children and how much more sense the day will make to your child if you have a predictable daily rhythm. You can watch it here : The Benefits of a Daily Rhythm.
Let’s touch on what a family rhythm is not.
A good family rhythm is not a one-size-fits-all. Our families are unique and no two family rhythms will be the same… we may weave the same activities into our rhythms but your family rhythm will always be unique to your own beautiful family.
It’s also important to note that your daily rhythm needs to be flexible and can be subject to change. It is not set in stone.
An inflexible rhythm is as unhealthy as having no rhythm at all.
Think of your daily rhythm as a gentle guide to bring out the best in you and your children. Daily life changes and fun things come up that vary from our routine. These spontaneous happenings are beautiful and add to your authentic life. It’s possible to enjoy life off the cuff while also having a family rhythm that helps your family thrive.
In the next entry, we’ll explore the details on how you can create a family rhythm that is unique to your beautiful family to help you connect and thrive together.
Blessings and magic,
Donni